Four beers and 11 shots. Four beers and 11 shots is how much it took to change a guy I knew and turn him into someone more sinister. That’s all it took to do something awful to a girl I used to know. To violate her so horribly she couldn’t fight anymore and just laid still. To confuse her so drastically she didn’t confess it out loud to me until weeks after. To terrorize her so immensely she couldn’t recuperate for months.

We’ve all heard the saying “think before you speak”, but maybe we should all try thinking before we act. As teenagers, we usually are given a pass to act out, to have fun and “make memories.” Fun memories fall short when a drunk driver hits a tree, killing his sober passenger who believed the driver was okay to drive. Fun memories fall short when girls at parties aren’t protected by friends or other companions, leading to them being accosted. Fun memories are cut short when emergency responders have to rush to the scene of a car crash you caused.

There was one I distinctly remember, a car crash to be exact. I heard about the tragedy from my mom, who knew the mother of the two victims. A 16-year-old girl allowed her 14-year-old sister to drive part of their long road trip. Neither of them were under the influence or trying to be reckless, however the older sister’s lack of caution when letting her younger sister drive led to a severely dangerous crash. Luckily, both girls survived, but only by a slim chance of a miracle. One sustained minor injuries, while the other was subjected to months of rehabilitation and strenuous discomfort. They didn’t think they were doing anything too dangerous, in fact danger probably didn’t cross their minds, but I’m asking you to let it cross your mind and steer your decision-making process.

You don’t mean to hurt anyone, I understand. You just want to have fun, I understand. You’re not a bad person, I understand. I’m not saying you can’t have fun or be wild. All I’m saying is play it a little safer.

If you’re going to party, make sure you have a safe ride home. If you’re hanging out with someone of the opposite sex, respect their boundaries and make sure they respect yours. If you’re driving in dangerous weather conditions, only drive fast enough that you can still see the road and operate safely.

Don’t be selfish. It’s your life, but it’s also the life of someone’s daughter or son, sister or brother, friend or classmate, cousin or grandchild. Don’t take that life away just for some fun times or some fun memories. Think a little smarter, be a little safer. One proverb said it best, “Better a thousand times careful than once dead.”